


Of Stone Steps and Speccy Gits

by TheLightFury



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Colourful language, Dramatic Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Humor, M/M, Snarky Draco Malfoy, amused harry potter, i apologise for nothing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:21:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27029536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLightFury/pseuds/TheLightFury
Summary: "Malfoy? What are you doing here?""Enjoying the ambiance," he quipped. "You should try it sometime. Some peace might settle that permanently electrocuted hair of yours."
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter
Comments: 6
Kudos: 98





	Of Stone Steps and Speccy Gits

**Author's Note:**

> I saw the prompt 'You didn't need to ask' and this came out of it! Thanks to @teawithpotter on Tumblr for the quick beta!

It was raining. Why was it always raining?! And cold. So fucking cold. You wouldn’t have thought it was only September. Stupid fucking British weather. Mother had told him to go to France. Why in Merlin’s name hadn’t he listened?

Hissing at a sudden brisk wind, he quickly renewed both his umbrella and warming charms, frowning as the latter failed to keep the icy feeling in his legs at bay. Stupid stone steps. Whoever invented them needed a good kicking—and yes, he was volunteering. Not that he had the energy, of course. His afternoon had been sure to drain him of that. 

_God_ , he could use a cup of Earl Grey right about now. But acquiring some would mean actually doing the thing he’d been avoiding for the last hour or so, and given that he wasn’t completely frozen yet, that simply wasn’t going to happen. But as the rain fractured his spellwork one drop at a time, the rude gnawing sensation that had accosted him for the better part of the afternoon returned with a vengeance. 

He could leave— _should_ leave, in fact. Honestly, he didn’t know why he’d walked here in the first place. This was the last, most ridiculous option he could have ever imagined turning to. And yet here he was. Freezing his bollocks off. Slowly allowing the rain’s dribble to ruin his fine attire. With absolutely no intention of leaving, no matter what his stupidly jittering nerves wanted him to do. But knowing he wasn’t going anywhere didn’t mean he knew what the fuck to do.

How did people make this look so simple? So easy? As though the very thought of it didn’t make them want to tear their very skin into confetti and bury themselves underneath it? It was unnatural. Absurd. Impertinent! The idea of his arse permanently attaching itself to the steps was preferable in comparison. It was completely, utterly, disgustingly—

"Malfoy?"

—inescapable.

_Fuck._

Instinct, cursed and traitorous, whipped his head around so fast his neck almost snapped in two, revealing—as dreaded—the saviour himself.

"Potter," he drawled quickly, as he lost the fight to yet another outrageously impudent shiver. "How nice of you to join me." 

_Merlin._ How could a single bemused smile warm his insides so? 

"What are you doing here?" 

"Enjoying the ambiance," he quipped. "You should try it sometime. Some peace might settle that permanently electrocuted hair of yours."

Ugh, just when did the roll of those stupidly brilliant eyes become so familiar? So addictive? 

"Draco…"

But there it was. His destruction. A single word. Two soft, measly syllables. And as they rolled gently, kindly, effortlessly from Potter's mouth, Draco’s perfectly arched eyebrow dropped limply back to its natural pathetic position quicker than a hippogriff could drop a turd. 

“Weeelll... there may have been a minor misunderstanding with the prick I was sharing a flat with—”

“ _Was_ sharing a flat with?” Potter, the absolute wanker, smirked.

“Yes _, was_ ,” Draco snipped. “And I _may_ have called him an absolute twat-waffle who I couldn’t bear to lay eyes upon ever again—” Harry snorted—“and for some incomprehensible reason, it appears he was offended.”

“Imagine that,” Potter barely suppressed a chuckle.

“Anyway,” Draco glared pointedly before sucking in a deep breath. “He may have changed the locks, warded the flat with Auror grade spells and left town for the foreseeable future.”

“I see.” Potter failed to suppress a horribly knowing grin. Wanker. “So… you’re locked out.”

Draco pursed his lips, the ever-changing patterns created by rain dancing on the concrete suddenly demanding his attention. “I suppose, if you must insist on being crude, you could put it that way.”

“And you have nowhere to go, seeing as Pansy and Greg are away, your parents live in France, and Blaise is off shacking up with every fuckable bloke in Brazil?”

“Bloody selfish cunts, the lot of them.”

“And so you decided that sitting out on the cold steps in front of my house, in the rain, after having walked for an hour because you hate apparating, was preferable to sitting on the cold steps in front of yours because...?” 

“Yours has a more satisfying view,” he grumbled into his knees. Because really, who wouldn’t prefer a crumbling grey cul-de-sac over a grassy knoll? A twat-waffle. That’s who.

“Of course!” Potter practically vibrated with silent laughter. “Uh, one final question,” he leant against the door frame, crossing those disgusting, gangly, ludicrously inviting arms over his chest with far too much nonchalance. “Just how long have you been admiring my spectacular view?”

As a single drop of frigid water slowly rolled down Draco’s neck, he viciously fought the heinous urge to shudder once more.

“Well, surrounded by such beauty—though a simpleton such as yourself may struggle to see it—it’s rather difficult to keep track of time, Potter," he snapped. "And I didn't realise I'd be interrogated on the matter, so it didn’t occur to me to check the particular minute that my hoofwanking bunglecunt of an ex-roommate abandoned me to the elements, so it’s rather unfair of you to demand such an answer, and I—” 

“Draco?” 

He sighed. Grumbled a “what?”.

“Get inside, you knob.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading, I really hope you enjoyed it! Come and find me on Tumblr: @april-thelightfury115


End file.
